Lumi (Cultivated Book 3) Read online

  “Imagine what a difference seven thousand dollars could make in their world. It’s only one week of your life, but for those children, it’s the difference between living like street dogs and having a bed and hope for their future.”

  I narrowed my eyes and tilted my head. “You just had to use that word, didn’t you?”

  “What word?” Atlas feigned innocence, but I didn’t buy it.

  “You know my grandfather called me a street dog when he found out I was of mixed race. That’s why he told my mother to stay away. Because of me, her illegitimate daughter.”

  “Right. Maybe that’s why Maximum went to India this time. To see your family roots.”

  “They’re not my family, Atlas. The Robertsons are.”

  He nodded. “And we want you to be happy. So, are you going to do it?”

  I drew in a deep breath. “On one condition.”

  “What’s that?”

  “You’ll make me the godmother of one of your children.”

  Atlas reached out his hand to seal the deal. “I was planning to do that anyway.”

  I hesitated but pushed myself to shake his hand. “I hate everything about this, but I’m going to trust you.”

  With a hand to the small of my back, Atlas led me back out to the garden. “Jo, how fast can you set up the experiment? Lumi has agreed to do it as a way to raise money for Indian street children.”

  Everyone at the long patio table was staring at us.

  “We’re doin’ it?” Damian asked with disbelief.

  I gave a single nod.

  “Fockin’ hell.” He ran both hands through his hair while Atlas and I went back to our seats.

  “Can we do it this week?” Jolene asked.

  “Eh.” Damian closed his eyes. “I have work shifts all week except Friday this week, and then I’m off until Tuesday, but I could swap that shift and take off a few more days.”

  “Great. What about you, Lumi? Could you take off time from Friday this week?”

  “There are some meetings that I would have to attend at the office, but if I can work from home for a few hours each day, then I think it’s doable.”

  “Great.” Atlas clapped his hands together. “Then, all you two have to decide is where you’ll be living during the experiment.”

  “At my place,” both Damian and I said at the same time.

  “Maybe you can do one night in each place or half-and-half,” River suggested, and then she grinned. “I’m a little jealous. It sounds fun.”

  Nathan pointed to me. “I don’t think Lumi agrees. She looks like she’s going to be sick.”

  He was right. My heart was racing, and I could feel sweat on my forehead. “Here. Have some more wine.” Charles said and filled my glass. “You might need it.”

  CHAPTER 2

  Day One

  Damian

  Jolene and Atlas were in Lumi’s apartment when I got there on Thursday evening.

  I was nervous because my friendship with Lumi was precious to me, and I didn’t want to ruin it by overstepping her boundaries.

  A bottle of wine, water, and snacks were on the beautiful dining table that I’d helped Lumi pick out when she moved in here four years ago.

  “I thought it would be a good idea if we discussed the purpose of this experiment and went over the rules that you must submit to,” Jolene stated.

  I nodded for her to go on, took off my zip-up shirt, and hung it on the back of the Danish design chair that I was sitting in. The eight dining chairs were beautiful, but I still didn’t understand why Lumi had bought them when they weren’t as comfortable as many of the others we had looked at and tested.

  “The purpose of this experiment is to help Lumi overcome her social anxiety. Lumi, you mentioned a few things that I wrote down, but I would like you to describe to us what you hope to get out of this week.”

  “Well.” Lumi looked around the room like the answers were on the walls. “It’s not that I don’t have a good life, because I do. I’m able to form friendships and relationships, and I love my family.”

  “We know.” Atlas smiled at Lumi. “And we love you too.”

  “Thank you.” Lumi scratched her shoulder. “It’s the part about living a limited life that bothers me. I used to dream of having a family one day, and I guess that I still do, but with my tolerance and patience with people being so low, I don’t see that happening.”

  We didn’t interrupt her but kept listening.

  “I used to think there was something wrong with the people around me, but as I grow older, I realize that I’m the one pushing them away. If I’m honest, it’s beginning to feel lonely.”

  “How do you push people away?” Jolene asked.

  “I’m told that I’m cynical and have trust issues. Whenever I’ve dated someone, it’s hard for me to open up to them, and at the first sign of trouble, I pull back like a tortoise, ignoring their text messages or phone calls.”

  Atlas took off his glasses and polished them with the fabric of his shirt. “Why? You’re never afraid of confrontations at work.”

  “Work is different. If people push me around at work, my claws come out, but in private, I rarely invest enough in people to spend the energy. I know I can do fine on my own.”

  “Hmm.” Jolene jotted down some notes. “So you’d rather cut people off than engage in fighting to resolve your issues.”

  “Yes.”

  “What caliber of trouble are we talking about? Can you give us some examples of what has made you pull back in the past?” Jolene asked.

  “It can be simple arguments about why I don’t like to go out all the time, why I don’t talk about my past, or why I’m not eager to meet their family. One time my date got upset because I tipped the waiter too much. I took offense because I hate the idea of anyone telling me what to do. I heard the waitress say that she was a single mom, and it was January. Christmas is expensive, so I figured a few hundred euros would make a big difference to her.”

  “I’m sure it did,” Jolene agreed. “Did you feel like your date was trying to control you?”

  Lumi shrugged. “He said that he wasn’t, but I still retreated. As I said, I have a low tolerance for people.”

  “It would make sense that growin’ up in a cult would make any person sensitive to others tryin’ to control them,” I said to support Lumi.

  “Good point.” Jolene sat with her forearms on the table, and her fingers intertwined. “What about Damian? Are you invested in him enough that you’d stay and have an argument?”

  I moved in my seat as past arguments came into my memory.

  “Damian is important to me.”

  “Good. There’s no doubt that the overexposure of his company will stress you out. But at least the handcuffs will force you to stay and resolve the situation instead of ghosting him.”

  Lumi and I exchanged a glance.

  “You’re nervous about this, aren’t you?” Jolene leaned over the table and placed her hand on Lumi’s wrist. “That’s okay. I trust that you can dig deep and solve any conflict that arises. In return, you’ll see that conflicts can serve to deepen and improve a relationship when you respectfully solve them.”

  “I don’t think we’ll have conflicts,” I said to ease the tension I felt from Lumi. “We’re good together.”

  Jolene smiled and pointed to a paper on the table. “I’ve made a contract that you’ll both have to sign.”

  Lumi picked it up and began reading.

  “Do ye mind putting it down so I can read, too?” I asked. “Or ye can read it aloud.”

  Lumi’s eyebrows knitted together as she read out the first rule.

  “By signing this contract, you agree to the following rules.

  1: Each day, you’ll send an email with the following:

  - A video diary in which you sum up your activities over the last twenty-four-hours. You’ll also report what challenges and positive things you’ve experienced.

  - A video of you going over the daily discussion questions provided by the research team.”

  Lumi paused and looked to Atlas and Jolene.

  “Go on.” Jolene nodded at the contract in Lumi’s hands.

  “2: Each day, you’ll do a minimum of one social activity that requires you to get out of the house together.”

  Lumi frowned. “What kind of social activity?”

  “That’s up to you. Each day you’ll decide on an activity together. You could go shopping, to the movies, visit friends, a museum, or exercise together,” Atlas suggested.

  “Or you could have fun at the local community pool,” Jolene pitched in.

  I laughed. “How would we do that? Jolene, ye’ve never been to a community pool in Ireland, have ye?”

  “No.”

  “Then take my word for it. We would have to shower before goin’ into the pool area, and they don’t have changin’ rooms for couples in handcuffs. Now, the lads might be fine with me bringin’ Lumi into the men’s dressin’ room, but I don’t want to. And I expect the staff would get complaints if I walked into the women’s shower room.”

  “Good point.” Jolene looked at Atlas, who crossed his arms and leaned back.

  “There’s always the beach.”

  Jolene nodded her agreement and focused in on Lumi. “The real challenge here is the closeness to a man, but since you’ve been honest about how social situations are stressful to you in general, we want to add that pressure to the experiment. It will overwhelm you, but we hope that you’ll look at it as a golden opportunity to work through your issues.”

  Lumi sighed and continued reading from the paper,

  “3: You’ll respect each other and refrain from sexual activities with yourself, the other party, or a third party unless there’s a verbal ag
reement between both parties.”

  “Hang on.” I dipped my eyebrows and gave Jolene a troubled look. “I get the part about not havin’ sex with other women while I’m chained to Lumi, but what’s this about not engaging in sex with ourselves?”

  “It refers to masturbation,” Jolene said.

  I crossed my arms. “That’s a hard line for me. I haven’t gone a full week without wanking since I was a lad. I can’t do that. I would turn into a walking bomb of sexual frustration.”

  Jolene shrugged. “Then I guess you’ll both have issues to work through.”

  “But we won’t be tied together twenty-four-seven, will we? I mean, we’ll have time for… ehm… private hygiene.”

  Instead of answering my question, Jolene motioned for Lumi to continue reading.

  “4. The cuffs shall remain on at all times, except in case of an emergency. For practical reasons, you may remove the handcuffs when you change clothing, use the toilet, or shower. You’ll need to document the reason for taking off the cuffs and keep track of the time apart. You must limit the minutes apart as much as possible! The minutes will be added to the last day of the experiment so that in the end, you will have spent seven full days linked together.”

  Lumi and I exchanged another long glance before turning to Jolene, who sat upright with her blonde shoulder-length hair in a ponytail, and her hands folded on the table. She reminded me of a schoolteacher.

  “What about when we sleep? I asked.

  “The handcuffs stay on at night.” Atlas’ eyes dropped to the paper in Lumi’s hand, encouraging her to read on.

  “5: Since you’re both right-handed, you’ll change hands each day to make it fair.”

  “Is that it?” I asked when they all sat in silence.

  Atlas smiled. “Yes. That’s it. If you follow the five rules, you’ll have seven thousand dollars each in a week, and hopefully, Lumi will have found a way to work through her issues.”

  Lumi tucked her hands under her thighs as if she refused to sign the contract. From the way her foot was tapping under the table, I could tell this was difficult for her.

  She would need me to go first, so I signed the two copies of the papers in silence and placed them in front of her.

  Lumi didn’t move her hands. She just stared at the papers.

  “Come on, princess. It’ll be fine,” I said to convince her.

  Her hands were shaking when she finally picked up the pen and put her legal name, Lumiere Robertson, on the contract.

  “Great!” Jolene stood up and leaned over the table to retrieve one of the contracts. “We’ll leave a copy for you if you need to go over the rules later on. Atlas, will you please place your sister and Damian in the handcuffs?”

  “I would be honored.” Atlas smiled and bent down to retrieve a pair of handcuffs from Jolene’s bag.

  I jerked my head back. “What the fock is that? Ye call those cuffs?”

  Jolene hurried to explain. “We realize that they’re different from the ones you use at work, Damian, but Atlas and I talked about it, and we agreed that a full week of wearing regular steel handcuffs would hurt your wrist too much. These have soft leather with fur inside that will feel comfortable to your skin.”

  Lumi wrinkled her nose in the direction of the black leather handcuffs. “Couldn’t you have found some without rivets? Where did you get them? A sex-shop?”

  Atlas gave an affirmative nod. “Who wants to go first?”

  I turned to Lumi. “Do ye want to start with yer right or left hand? I broke my right when I was a teenager, so I’m not too bad with my left. I don’t mind going first.”

  She glanced at me. “Thank you.”

  Getting up from my chair, I held out my right arm and let Atlas put the handcuffs on me.

  “Your turn, sis,” Atlas said and held out the other part to her.

  Lumi didn’t look at me when she got up from her chair and walked to stand on my right side. She lifted her left arm to Atlas, but from the way she was biting her lips and had her eyes closed with an expression of pain, I waited for Lumi to shout “no” at any second.

  The “no” never came, and a few seconds later, Atlas stepped back with the key in his hand. “It’s done.”

  “Good.” Jolene had a satisfied smile on her lips as she pulled out a small stack of paper from her bag.

  “Here are seven papers with daily questions we want you to discuss. Some of them are random, while others are personal. Remember that you signed a contract in which you promised to be honest with each other.”

  “Yes, ma’am.” I gave a bad imitation of an American accent to loosen up the tense atmosphere a little, and as soon as Atlas and Jolene had left, I touched Lumi’s arm. “It’s goin’ to be fine. Ye’ve known me for ten years. We’re friends.”

  “Eleven years,” she corrected me. “Eleven years, nine months, and twenty-two days. The first day we met was November fifth. Today is August twenty-seventh.”

  “I know, lass.” I used my left hand to stroke her upper arm. Lumi’s throwing out numbers was a sure sign that she was insecure. “Sometimes, it feels like yesterday, but then I see how ye’re no longer the teenager I carried out of the house that night.”

  Lumi lowered her brow. “I haven’t been that girl for over a decade.”

  “Look at the bright side. At least you no longer have a crush on me.” I raised our chained hands. “That would have made this awkward.”

  Lumi gave me a blank stare and changed the subject. “I’m thirsty.” The moment she started walking toward her kitchen, I had my first realization about how this would be.

  “We’re going to be like two brains in one body.”

  “Excuse me?”

  “You want to live your life, and I want to live mine, but we’ll have to compromise and do a little of both since we can’t go our separate ways.”

  “Do you want anything?” she asked when she opened her fridge and pulled out a bottle of water.

  “No, I’m good. To be honest, I’m tired. It’s been a hard week at work.”

  “What happened?”

  “Maybe ye heard about the political summit that Ireland was hosting?”

  “Yes. I saw it on the news.”

  “We’ve had everyone workin’ on security, protectin’ the international heads of states. Nothin’ but long shifts all week.”

  Lumi led us back into her pristine living room, picked up the papers from her dining table, and moved to her white sofa. She had decorated her apartment with expensive pieces of art and beautiful designer furniture that people on my salary could only drool over, but my favorite part about this place was the bay window with a view of the canal and the rooftop terrace that came with the penthouse.

  “I’m sorry to hear it’s been such a hard week for you, but at least you did a good job. I’m sure the public would have found out if you’d lost a few heads of states to terrorism.”

  I yawned and rubbed my eyes. “I think the press was hopin’ somethin’ like that would happen. It makes for juicy news. Anyway, what do ye want us to do first?”

  Lumi held up the papers Jolene had given us. “How about we get today’s questions out of the way?”

  Despite this place being tidy as a museum, I knew from our past movie nights that Lumi was fine with me putting my feet up on her coffee table. Getting comfortable, I leaned my head back on the back of the couch. “Ye mean one of those discussions that we need to record?”

  “Yes.” Lumi placed her phone against a candle and moved a little closer to me. “I think we’re both in the picture now. All right, let’s see. There’s one page for each day.”

  Her eyes ran over the questions on the list, and then she gave a small snort. “Most of these are easy, but you won’t know the answer to the last one.”

  “What’s the last one?”

  “What do I wish people knew about me?”

  The edge of my mouth lifted. “I can answer that question.”

  “It’s not what you wish people knew about you. It’s what you think that I wish people knew about me.”

  “Oh.” I looked at her. “And we have to be honest?”

  “Yes.” Lumi wrinkled her nose up and undid the bun on her head. Her long shiny, black hair cascaded down and changed her appearance from stylish businesswoman to a more relaxed version of my friend. The scent of flowers and femininity wafted through the air and ignited parts of my brain that I had put on lock-down when it came to Lumi.